Top 3

Lake Natoma Inn

Ceremony site

Garden area - where we can take pictures

Reception Room


Pros: I like the crystal chandaliers and the draped celiing in the reception room.
Cons: The ceremony site is okay. I like the garden area better, but its farther away and the gazebo area is RIGHT outside of our room. So if we don't use it, someone else might making their wedding outside of our room.

oh and plus no one in our group yesterday really liked it.

Site 2: The Hotel
Arden Hills Country Club

Ceremony Site:

Bridal Suite:

Reception room:


Pros: Nice clean reception room, love love love the bridal suite and the little mini-mansion like bed and breakfast inn its in, I'd be able to have mixed drinks, good pictures spots on the property.
Cons: Kind of dim in the room - Hardly any of my pictures on my camera came out nice, I'm not too crazy about the ceremony area - plus that fountain is loud (and shaped like a giant penis...), unknowledgeable staff, might end up being more because no one was able to answer all of my finance questions, The reception room we'd end up going with is not my favorite one there, but the one I like is the big fancy room - the 200 person minimum room and it has a very high food minimum

Site 3: Harmony Wynelands

Granny Bridal Room with private attached bathroom:

Garden Arch Ceremony Area:

Another view of the arch decorated with tulle:

Reception area:


Gazebo (also a ceremony site option but we can use it for the head table or just for me and aaron:


Pros: Close to home, pretty garden area, friendly staff
Cons: Everything would be outside, everyone would be in the same area the WHOLE time (even watching us take pictures), Only beer, wine, champagne served - no alcohol I'd drink, granny style bridal suite.

I give up

My mom looked at the two pictures of the wedding venue I like and then preceeded to nitpick it. *rolls eyes*
Then she said she didn't want to pay for the venue, she'd rather pay for the invitations and the dress and etc. Stuff that really wont amount to much. So I suggested her paying for the food. Thats the other big expense. I dont really want her paying for all the little stuff because I want to be able to pick what I want without her criticizing it or me in the process.
The she preceeded to go on and on about how lovely pink dresses would look on the bridesmaids. or brown. or red. or at least at the very least if I have to have blue, navy. Anything but light blue. Light blue is ugly and she personally would not want to wear bright blue. She commented that she was glad I would not be forcing her to wear blue to my wedding.
What is wrong with BLUE?!!?
Augh... I guess you can't please everyone.
and you know what I am sick of trying.

augh...

So Aaron and I went to the library today. While I was waiting for him, I went upstairs and looked through the wedding books. I found one book with a neat idea for centerpieces if we decide to have our wedding at one of the places we are looking at. The venue gives you a mirror tile and votive candles for each table. That way you only have to add some sort of main thing in the middle -- like a bigger pillar candle, or a bowl with a flower, or something..

like this:


So I saw a book that showed a small square vase or could be a bowl with blue water and a white floating candle in it. It looked pretty and would probably look really good on the mirror tile.

While arranging with my mom what time to meet us so we can carpool to look at the top 3 choices tomorrow, I tell her about the centerpiece idea that I liked.

So this is our converstation:
Mom: Well I thought they gave you the centerpieces
Me: Well they give you the mirror tile and the votive candles, you just add the focal point
Mom: what good is that? Might as well give you nothing
Me: If they give you nothing, I'd have a small bowl of blue water with a candle floating in it
Mom: I thought you said you wouldn't have to buy centerpieces if you went there
Me: Well we could get away with not having a huge floral display at each table
Mom: Thats just dumb.. You aren't saving any money

Me: *bangs head into desk*

Save the Dates

My mom's friend found a bunch of clearance invites marked down to $3 at michaels. They really aren't what we were thinking of using for the invites.. but she'll be mad if we don't use them at all..

So I've been thinking, We have 100 blank printable invitations that we don't want to use for our wedding invitations. We won't use that many for either our shower or our rehersal dinner. I was thinking of using them as save the dates, but I have my heart set on magnets.

Would it be okay to print pretty much what we are going to say on the magnet on the "invitations" and put them in with the magnets? or would that be redundant?

Or anything else we can use it for as an insert for the magnets?

I'm just not sure what we are going to use them for...

Marriage Advice

No doubt there are days when you feel as though you deserve the BestWife in the World award: You make sure dates with your mate stay hot,you settle arguments with amazing grace and you don't always go intowhining mode when you find his dirty socks next to, rather than in, thehamper. How did you get so smart? You were given some stellar marriageadvice from friends and family. Here, the nuggets of nuptial wisdomyou've stayed faithful to over the years.

Polite Fight
"On my wedding-invitation RSVP cards, I left space for guests to writetheir favorite wedding wisdom. The tidbit that rings truest afteralmost nine months of marriage is: 'Attack the issue, not each other.'How it works: If my husband and I disagree about something, we stayfocused on the issue and skip the personal put-downs."
— Melissa Gitter Schilowitz, 31, Metuchen, NJ

Fit to a Tee
"My grandmother insisted that I learn how to play golf. 'If yourhusband loves to play, you can go along and spend hours together,' shesaid. So I took lessons, and now my husband and I hit the links once amonth. We both love the game and are thrilled to share a hobby, evenwhen we spend half an hour looking for my out-of-bounds balls!"
— Aimee Borders, 27, Houston, TX

Tabletop Trick
"My aunt told me that if I'm running late when it's my turn to makedinner, just set the table. That way my husband thinks he'll be eatingany minute, so he doesn't start complaining, which buys me some time.It's a silly trick that sounds straight out of the 1950s, but I have toadmit that I've tried it a few times in the three years I've beenmarried — and it works!"
— Dawn Clayton, 34, Holdrege, NE
Perfect 10
"My husband's great-aunt wrote a list of the10 most important things in a marriage, and she gave it to me at mybridal shower. It read:

10.Patience
9. Kindness
8. Patience
7. Communication
6. Patience
5. Caring
4. Patience
3. Patience
2. Love
1.Patience

"First of all, this couldn't be more true. Second, an 80-year-old woman made up a top-10 list; how funny is that?"
— Beth Power, 26, Arlington, VA

Ratio for Romance
"After my husband and I got together, a close friend of mine told me,'If the sex is good, it's only 10 percent of the marriage. But if thesex is not so good, it's 90 percent. So do your darndest to make sureit stays really, really good!'"
— Emily Cho-Basco, 28, Los Angeles

Boob-Tube Brilliance
"Because my husband is such a remote-control freak, my mom suggestedthat we have 'my turn' TV nights. That means three nights a week I getto hold the remote and watch whatever I want, and on the other nightsit's his turn to hold the remote and watch whatever he wants. Now whenhe starts flipping through the channels, it doesn't get on my nerveslike it used to."
— Angela Clayton, 27, Odenton, MD

Pop the Question
"My sister-in-law passed this helpful hint on to me, and it has servedme well for our five years of wedded bliss: 'Marriage is not mindreading, so ask your spouse what he/she wants and believe what he/shesays.'"
— Clare Graca, 27, Dallas

Nix the Nit-Picking
"Before I said 'I do,' my mom (who'sbeen married to my dad for 55 years) told me to take out a piece ofpaper and write down the top three things that bugged me about myhusband-to-be. Then she told me to forget the things on that list andforgive him for not being flawless. Once you make a commitment thisbig, she explained, you can't let petty things get in the way. In oureight years of marriage, my husband and I have had two kids, tackledcross-country moves and started two businesses -- and so far, so great."
— Rebecca Hart Blaudow, 31, Jacksonville, FL

Space Smarts
"Always have separate closets, my best friend told me. It may seemsilly, but I listened to her and made sure to find a one-bedroomapartment with two closets (mine being the larger, of course). Now myhusband and I each have our own private space, and we respect that: Ifhe wants to keep his shoes in one huge heap or leave his dirty clothesin a pile on the floor, the mess doesn't bother me a bit!"
— Patricia Bontekoe, 26, Lake Hiawatha, NJ

Agree to Disagree
"Before we got married, my minister told my husband and me, 'You aretwo imperfect people making an imperfect union, and that's wonderful.'This advice made me ditch my belief that in a happy marriage, thecouple always agrees. My husband and I have learned to appreciate ourdifferences (yes, even differences of opinion!); in fact, we encouragethem because we realize now that those differences are what makes eachof us unique and special."
— Beth Swanson, 28, Chicago

Comic Relief
"Before I headed down the aisle, my stepfather told me to always laughand never take myself too seriously. After four years of marriage, Iknow that this trick works. My husband and I often play practical jokeson each other and always try to crack each other up, even in the middleof an argument. Hey, if one person laughs, a fight tends to fizzle,doesn't it?"
— Lisa Giassa, 31, Bogota, NJ

You've probably heard a few of these pieces of marital pop wisdombefore. If so, these marriage experts say to promptly forget 'em.

Love means never having to say you're sorry.
"Oh, please! In marriage, love sometimes means having to say you'resorry even if you don't know what you did or you didn't mean to do it."
— Trisha Taylor, psychotherapist, Houston, TX

Always be totally honest.
"What are you going to do, tell him that he's just too short and youcan't stand his mother? Sometimes you need to temper the truth."
— Tara Fields, Ph.D., marriage, family and child therapist, Marin County, CA

Children come first.
"This is bad advice if it means your husband always comes second. Ofcourse you should love and care for your kids, but you should neverlose sight of your couple-ness. The best thing a child can have ishappy, fulfilled parents who are deeply in love."
— Mary Pender Greene, chief of social work services, Jewish Board of Family and Children's Services, New York

Always keep the peace.
"No, no, no. If you don't face a hot issue head-on, you'll stockpilenegative feelings. And before you know it, 20 years go by and you'restill fighting over the same thing because you never resolved it in thefirst place."
— Rebecca S. Ward, M.S.W., psychotherapist, Little Rock, AR

Never go to bed angry.
"Forget it. Often a couple needs time to calm down before they canrationally wrap up an argument. And that may take a few days, so in themeantime, get some sleep!"
— Gilda Carle, Ph.D., psychotherapist, New York

Temper tantrums galore

My mother is like a spoiled brat throwing a temper tantrum because she is not getting her way.

Her dream wedding for me is:
A cheap wedding where we still have some of her money left over to take a nice honeymoon. Shes only giving us a few thousand. So how are we supposed to plan a wedding, have a wedding, with food etc, and still have money left over for a european honeymoon? I don't know. Considering most places around here cost at least a few thousand to even to rent a place. Then she keeps talking about this fancy $1000 rehersal dinner.. so she is just confusing the hell out of me.

She is really upset about us venturing outside of the stockton area to look at wedding sites. Eventhough she very willingly went to a few places with me in Modesto. So I dont know why she is upset about that. She said no one will want to go an hour away for the wedding. When they will. My aunt (who never travels) said she'd go as far as sacramento.. or any place the same distance away.

Basically what she wants is:

a small wedding close to home with all of her friends and none of mine (in her opinion we should invite all the people who will give the best gifts (her friends) and the first people to cut would be my friends (all the college students with limited income)). Where we spend all of our money on her friends and family. Where we have limited people our age there and all the older people taking over. Shes been arguing with me about why I want a dj (because all the old people won't dance) and why we want as long a reception as we can have... because all the old people will leave by 9 anyways. So I was like who cares if they leave, that leaves everyone else to party and have fun. It could be just me and Aaron there til 11 or 12 and I'd be okay with that.

Then she wants us to choose the cheapest location - a place Aaron absoluetly hates. All the cheap ones (a few thousand less at the most) are the ones that look the worst and/or need the most decorations. If we choose a place that is already pretty, we need less decoration thus saving money.

If we can spend the extra few thousand towards a prettier location instead of decorating a place that needs a lot of decorations.

Basically I think I am being punished because Jenn has a big elaborate wedding, so I'm supposed to make up for that by being satisfied by having a small dinky ratty wedding? Whats wrong with wanting to get married somewhere pretty?

She thinks I talked Aaron into spending money he didn't want to spend. I did not. I basically took Aaron around and showed him what we could afford on the budget he proposed and he decided to up the budget himself because he didnt like any of them.

My mom said "I don't want to be a part of some big fancy wedding. I thought you were different than Jennifer. But you are just the same."

Well if I am the same.. don't come. If she ruins my wedding day, I will never forgive her.

Oh and she's been offering her friend as a photographer for awhile - but she hasn't been able to get a hold of him - and now she's telling me she doesn't know who will take our pictures when we are soooooooo far away. (there are such things as a photographer)

I do know this - I am not choosing a place that either me or aaron doesnt like just to please my mom. I'll take her suggestions but they are just that - suggestions. I'm not going to turn my wedding into something I dont like just to please my mom or anyone else.

I'll choose the dresses I want
the place i want
..etc

I dont care what anyone but Aaron thinks... because it is OUR day... not their day.

Lockeford Springs Golf Course

Golf Course


Front:

Patio area where the reception would be:


The patio can also be used as a reception area if the weather is bad. You would just face these doors:

View of the lake from the patio:

The other ceremony site:

There is the lake behind the grass... They would cut the grass down the day before the wedding so it is visible in pictures and during the ceremony..
Door I would be walking out of:

Bride changing room:


Vineyards all along the edges of the course:

The room where the cake would be in and a place people can go as well, to get away from outside:

I know there is someone in this shot, but its the bar area. The bar is really nice as well. The bar has a granite top.. but you can't see the bar. I just took a picture of the bar area. The bar area would be open as well for our guests to hang out.


I think this place is nice and has potential..

Pros and cons:
It was a little dirty when I went - but I was assured that they had a huge tournament over the weekend and they were in the process of cleaning today. I will give them the benefit of the doubt since I went early in the morning
There were a few places on the property that looked bad.. but I guess you can't expect everywhere to be picturesque can you?
Everything looked pretty new and nice
They only have long rectangle tables - I like the round tables better
They don't have a bar package.. so it would be open bar, but we can do a limited or a limited amount..etc
The grass around the lake bugged me. I mean if you have a lake, why hide it with tall grass? I don't know how much they would cut and how visible the lake would be... because the lake is the main selling point for me. I love the idea of getting married near the water.
Plus the waterfront patio is nice. :)

CSUS Alumni Center

Venue 12









Its the alumni center at the college Aaron and I both went to. Its basically a long room with glass windows along all the sides. I don't know where you would have a ceremony. I know the university has a pretty quad.. but again, it would be pretty public. I think this room is basically for a reception only. Although I guess you could techincally get married outside under the columns...
It does have a pretty fountain, some nice flowers and some pretty colored trees..
The only weird part is this scupture on one of the lawns in front of the building:

My mother and the church

Oh and did I mention that my mom has been mentioning quite a few times that she wants us to get married in her church by her pastor.

Okay. Lets just say for the record that she has been bouncing around from church to church since we were kids. I've been to lots of different churches in my life. I haven't really been to chruch since High School except a handful of times when I was at a friends house..etc

So now she decided a few years ago that she is a Methodist. She's been a member of this congregation for at least awhile because I went with her once to church. I don't really remember anything about it.

So then when I was calling around looking for an officiant, she didnt say anything. Then when I told her I thought I found one that seemed pretty cheap, she asked about what church he was at etc. Thats when she started going off about how she didn't really approve of someone that was from a community church. She wanted a methodist minister.

Now I would be okay with it, if she offered to pay the extra (if hers cost more), if her pastor seemed okay and didn't make it a highly religious ceremony... We just want something simple and non-religious.

Then she was like - well whats wrong with a religious ceremony.

Well nothing, but thats not really what we want.

Some bridesmaid dresses

I thought I'd post some pictures since two of my friends have tried on dresses. Who knows what styles they will have when we actually go to order. I thought I'd just show some pictures of what I like:

1. This one only comes in this color.. so it is probably out

2. Besides this color, this one comes in red, orange and yellow..wtf?
These all come in a bunch of colors
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.
10.
11.
12.
13.
14.
15.
I like these colors:
a.
b.
c.
but who knows...

So which do you like best?